9.11

"So I was at the mall today and I got this dress."

He keeps his head down. Growls quietly.

"I thought I could wear it to Kathy's daughter's wedding."

He lifts his head. His tongue hangs out of his mouth. His eyes light up.

"I tried it on. I think it looks ok. Would you like to see it on?"

He sniffs around the room, barks, and then puts his head back down.

"Well I hope it doesn't make my hips look big. You don't think my hips are too big right?"

He whimpers.

"So you don't think it'll make me look fat right?"

He puts his head back on the floor. He closes his eyes.

"I've been following all these weight loss tips I read in one of those women's health magazines but I don't think it's working. Do you think they're working?"

He rolls over. Wiggles his back around on the floor.

"Do I look slimmer to you?"

He rolls back over. Gets up. Sniffs around the floor.

"Are you listening to me?"

He looks up, tilts his head, then barks. Tongue hanging out of his mouth again.

"Anyway I have to go pick up Sarah from soccer ok bud? I'll feed you when I get home. Be a good boy while I'm gone."

He runs to the window and watches the car leave the driveway. He barks. Then into the kitchen to sniff around on the floor.